March 5, 2012

Take Nothing For Granted

As I turned out the light in James' room tonight, I felt sad and lost as a mother.  And not for the first time ever.

Last night, I had read about a family that just lost their almost four year old boy... out of nowhere.  He was sleeping, safe...and then he wasn't. 

As I told the babies goodnight tonight, I realized that what it's very likely I will see them in the morning, alive and well, but there is a chance that tonight is our last night... that every day could be the last.  I have been taking too much for granted. I won't do it anymore.

I read "Pinkalicious" with the Princess Stella, and she whispered to me, "Mommy, I love you. You are just a beautiful pink princess."
"I love you too, Stella Rae," I said.
"Oh, I know, Mommy, you always say dat," she said, "I love you, and Ms. Joni, and Daddy.  Where is Daddy?"
I said, "He's on a trip."
"Oh yeah," she said, "He'll be back and bring me two presents."
James & his "girlfriend," Avery
As I stood in the doorway to James' room, I told him, "I love you." He said, "I love you too.  Goodnight, Mom."
"You're my best boy, James."
He giggled, "You're my best girl, Mom."

If tomorrow never comes, I hope they know I love them.  And if they don't, then maybe they'll have the memory of the day we all three had "robot legs."

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